Fear The Dawn: Chapter 7

It was late in the afternoon when Aidan finally left his apartment. It was very cold out, and he was running late, so he jogged the three blocks down to the diner. He was a bit out of breath when he reached the door, glancing apprehensively at his watch as he walked inside.

“Aidan!” Tina greeted him happily as he approached the table, throwing her arms around him.

“Sorry”, he said, scratching the side of his face. “I was running a little late.”

“Oh, so you ran here”, she said, poking him with her elbow. “And here I thought your heart was racing because of me.”

“Ha ha”, he rolled his eyes at her. “I was going over my notes from this afternoon and I kind of fell asleep.”

“Mr Kowalsky's class totally does that to me, too”, she laughed. “If it wasn't for the funny jokes you write in the margins of your notebook I'd probably snore right through the lectures.”

“Well, there's nothing funny about our debate topic. How are we supposed to present the 'no' side of minimum wage?”

“Oh come now, Aidan, where's your ruthless corporate spirit? These proletariat dogs should be happy just to be able to come in out of the cold!”

Tina pounded her fist on the table just as the waitress appeared at their table. She gave them a strange look as she took their orders.
“Great, now they're going to burn my hamburger on purpose.”

“I'm sure she knew I was joking.”

“So, did you find anything even vaguely reputable that supports our side of the argument or is it just going to be five solid minutes of 'The invisible hand will choose the best result for everyone'?”

“You should do some funny hand gestures, that'll help kill time.”

“We're doomed”, Aidan lamented, smacking his forehead with his palm.

“Well, let's see if we can find something better”, Tina pulled out a few large books from her bag, and they leafed through them while they ate.

---

“It's too noisy here”, Tina complained, closing her book. “I can't concentrate on this stuff with all these people talking.”

The little diner had really filled up while they were eating. “We could go back to my apartment and work on it, it's not far.”

“That sounds good”, she said, packing away her things. “I haven't seen your new place yet.”

“It's pretty great, I've got my own kitchen and everything. No more fighting over the residence stove.”

“Maybe I should move in with you”, she joked, and they paid their cheques and left the diner.

The sun was just beginning to set as they left, painting the bottom of the clouds in a dark red hue.

“Look at that”, Tina pointed, “it's such a beautiful evening.”

“Pity we have to spend it hunting through books, huh?”

She locked arms with him and pressed up against his shoulder. “We can enjoy it on the way home, at least.”

“I just thought of another argument for our debate”, Aidan said, gesturing with his free hand. “When you're living in the park, you can see a beautiful sunset like this every night!”

She laughed. “You're funny, Aidan. Have you ever thought about doing anything with that?”

“I don't think there's a huge market for business-related comedy”.

“I'm sure there's something, you're good at it.”

“Well, maybe. What about you? Are you sure you want to go into business?”

“I'm not sure yet. I can't picture what I'm going to do with my whole life, you know? It's just too much to think about.”

Aidan shrugged his free shoulder. “Well, let's just worry about tonight for now. There'll be time to figure out the rest later.” She nodded in agreement.

“Wow, this place is great!”, she said, staring out the window. “You can see the bay from here!”

“Yeah”, he put his keys down on the table in the kitchen, and she joined him. “The kitchen is here, there's the TV and my bed, and the bathroom is just beyond that door.

“Where do you do laundry?”

“That's on the first floor of the building.”

“We should go check that out later.”

“We'd probably better get to work, there's a lot to do.”

“All right”, she said, flopping down on the love seat in front of the TV and pulling out her books. “It's nice and quiet with just the two of us here. Let's get started.”

Aidan sat down on the bed and started searching through one of the big textbooks for anything they could use. From time to time they discussed potential points and he jotted down some notes, but it was slow going. He found his mind wandering to the conversation they had early about their futures. He wasn't really sure if this was what he wanted to do with his life. He did enjoy making jokes a lot better, but could you really lead a stable life doing something like that?

Tina yawned. “What time is it?”

“Oh wow,” Aidan replied, looking at the clock. “It's 12:15. I didn't think we'd been working on this for so long.”

She yawned again, covering her mouth with her hand. “I guess we've done enough for tonight, I'd better be getting back.”

“It's after midnight, the last bus has already gone.”

“That's okay, I'll walk.”

“I'm not letting you walk halfway across town by yourself at this time of night”, Aidan insisted. “Why don't you stay here?”

“Well, if you're offering, I don't mind.”

“Sure, you can have the bed.”

“Where will you sleep? This little couch isn't big enough.”

“That's fine, I can sleep on the floor.”

She laughed. “That's very chivalrous of you, but it's all right, we can share the bed. I know you well enough.”

“No, it's all right-”, he protested.

“I'm not kicking you out of your bed, if you're not sleeping in it I'm sleeping on the floor.”

“It's really not very big.”

She put her arms around his neck. “It's okay, we can snuggle up a bit.”

He felt his cheeks flush, so he quickly dropped this issue. “All right. I don't have a spare toothbrush or any woman’s pyjamas or anything, though.”

“That's okay, I have some of that stuff in my bag.” She rummaged through it and pulled out a few things. “Just in case”, she added quickly.

Aidan went to the washroom first, brushed his teeth, and changed into his pyjamas. He wasn't totally comfortable with the idea of sharing a bed with her, and he realized to his distress that his long flannel pyjamas wouldn't hide anything if he had any inappropriate thoughts. He tried to focus on their debate as he came out of the washroom and quickly got into bed and pulled the covers over himself. Tina smiled at him and slipped inside the door to the bathroom to get ready for bed.

She returned from the bathroom wearing a set of white cotton pyjamas. They were loose-fitting, but the shadows made it obvious where the curves in her body were. “What'dya think?” She asked playfully, noticing his eyes on her. He quickly looked away. “It's okay, you can look”, she teased him, running the back of her hand down her chest and pulling the fabric down past her waist so it really showed off her figure. She grinned at him and climbed into the bed.

There wasn't a lot of room for the two of them in that bed, but it didn't seem to concern her much, she just folded her arms vertically in front of her chest and snuggled up to him. He wrapped his arm around her and held her close. He hadn't expected anything like this to happen, but it was kind of nice, he was glad not to be sleeping on the floor.

“Ready to go to bed?” he asked her.

“Yeah.” He reached over and turned off the light. The moon was full tonight, and a pale white light blanketed the room.

“Do you want me to shut the curtains?”

“No, I like it”, she said, snuggling up a bit closer to him.

It was a bit tricky to get comfortable, but eventually they found a position for their arms and legs that worked out well enough, and he was about to drift off to sleep wrapped tightly around his closest friend.

But then he felt her tongue on his neck.

He opened his eyes and found her staring warmly at him, just barely visible in the moonlight. He had never been in a real relationship before, but there was no mistaking the look in her lidded eyes. His heart started pounding in his chest as her fingers gently walked up his back, and then she leaned forward to kiss him. The feeling of her lips against his suddenly made him realize that he was spending a night alone with a girl, and he was shocked by the feelings it awoke within him for someone he thought was only a good friend. The kiss only lasted a moment, but it was a little while before either of them dared to speak.

“Tina...” he whispered.

“Do you feel the same way?”

He could scarcely deny it, their bodies were held far too close together for him to hide his arousal. He nodded, and her eyes lit up. They kissed again, with their tongues this time, passionately embracing cuddling each other as they rolled around in his little bed.

“Tonight's the night”, he thought incredulously, as she lifted her shirt up and he took it off of her. Her breasts were not huge, but the sight of her bare chest in the moonlight almost overpowered his senses. After receiving an approving nod from her, he placed his hands on her breasts, exploring and caressing them. They were softer than he had ever imagined they could be, and she gasped softly as he squeezed and kissed her body. She took off his shirt too, and stroked and scratched his chest with her fingers. After a little while, his hands worked their way down to her waist and to the brim of her pants. She started to caress him more intently, and he surprised himself by slipping his hand inside her pants. She moaned softly under his touch and quickly returned the favour. She was so soft and wet, and the pleasure of someone else stroking him was so intense that he could barely hold on. He thought it would end just like that, but she stopped him.

“Not like this”, she said, in a voice scarcely above a whisper. “I want to give you something you'll never forget.”

She kissed him again, then pushed the covers back, slid down towards his feet, pulled his pants down, and took him in her mouth. Whatever self-control he had left was completely overwhelmed by the feeling of being inside her, and he didn't make it even ten seconds before he reached his peak. He was briefly worried that she might not have been prepared for it, but she seemed to know it was coming and kept going until he was completely done. She showed it to him, swallowed it, and gave him a sly smile that absolutely sang of passion and desire as he stared at her in complete amazement.

Whatever she saw in his face, she obviously liked it. She ran her hand across his chest, then slowly slipped out of her pants, laid down on her back with her legs spread wide apart, and beckoned to him. He took a moment to drink in the incredible sight of her naked body, and he found his desires returning faster than he had ever known they could.

“It's my first time”, she said shyly, placing one of her hands over her chest.

“Mine too” he said, caressing her side and waist. “Are you sure this is okay?”

She nodded. “I'm on the pill, don't worry.” She blushed a little, which really made her look cute. “I really want this, I've been hoping it would happen for a long time.”

“Me too”, he said, surprising himself, as he certainly hadn't been expecting this earlier, but now he was starting to realize that this desire had been lingering in the back of his mind for a while now. He positioned himself over her, and she gave him those eyes again and wrapped her arms around him, pulling his body towards hers. “I love you, Aidan. I'm so glad it's you. I'll never forget tonight as long as I live.”

Her words struck him right in the chest. Tonight changed things. Tomorrow they would wake up not as friends, but as lovers. It was a bit scary to think about, but he found himself getting used to the idea rather fast. They had always gotten along very well, and were probably a pretty good match for each other, too. Despite his incredibly tenuous grasp over his desires, he wasn't one to take such delicate matters of the heart lightly, but after what she had just told him there was probably a chance for this to become something serious. He might even be looking into the face of his future wife.

Yet as crazy as that all sounded right now, the thought of it didn't really bother him. She was kind. She was funny. He always liked being around her. He hadn't really noticed it before, but she was beautiful, too. Her body was slender, but curved in all the right places, her breasts were firm and perky, but incredibly soft to the touch, and her long golden hair was radiant and captivating. She had a pretty face, too, looking at it made him feel warm inside, especially those big blue eyes that gazed back at him so lovingly. It was then that he realized that he loved her, just as she loved him, and that he really did want this. He lowered himself into position and rubbed against her, ready to take this next step with her.

So why hadn't it worked out that way?

To this day, he still didn't really understand it.

He opened his mouth to tell her how he felt about her, but somehow, it didn't come out. Instead, he ended up telling her that he couldn't go through with it. At first she didn't believe him, but when it sunk in she cried her eyes out, utterly heartbroken. That was by far the most painful moment he had ever known. She thought it was her, something that she had done wrong, but it really wasn't. She was going to leave, but he asked her not to, he told her she was still his friend, and that he still cared for her, and persuaded her to stay, but they kept their distance in the bed after that. The next morning, they never spoke of it again. They remained friends, but they were never as close again after that.

But why? He had been so into it just a moment before. What happened?

Of course, that was the one part of the memory that he didn't remember so vividly. All he could recall was a strong feeling that it just wasn't right, somehow. He couldn't say why not, if he had ever known exactly what it was that changed his mind it had faded a moment later. Thinking back, he wondered if he had just been very nervous and panicked. He had largely put that night out of his mind for the past five years, but seeing her this afternoon and hearing her lie about it brought all the memories flooding back.

He couldn't sleep. He felt a horrible mixture of desire, guilt, and regret, and no matter how he tried to push those thoughts out of his mind they wouldn't go away. He got out of his bed and paced around his apartment. He glanced over at the phone. “I should call her”, he thought. “I can't leave things that way”.

But that was one of those crazy late-night thoughts that he knew better than to act upon. It was five years ago, and she had a fiance now. That ship sailed a long time ago, and he had chosen to stay on the shore.